Physical Address
304 North Cardinal St.
Dorchester Center, MA 02124
Physical Address
304 North Cardinal St.
Dorchester Center, MA 02124
Driving home from work, John starts thinking about how bad his day was. His boss yelled at him, the work piled up and he counted down the minutes until he left the office. John can’t wait to get back home and have relaxing night with his family.
John walks through the door of his house to find his 4 children running around the house, screaming full of energy, At his breaking point, John opens his mouth to yell at the kids, telling them to calm down and sit in front of the TV. The kids slow their pace and saunter over to the TV; John has effectively transferred his negative emotional state to his children.
Even the best of intentions have the worst of re – processions. There’s a couple reasons for this, and each one leads to mis – communication.
The first reason is an external force that you have no control over. This is another person’s perspective of your actions. If another person looks at you and perceives your actions as negative, even with the best of intentions, there will be mis-communication.
The second reason for miscommunication is allowing your internal emotions to dictate your external actions. This happens with the people who you spend the most time with, for the most part.
John has a bad day at work. John comes home and just wants some peace, but has 4 kids running around the house screaming. John takes out his anger from work on the kids, yelling at them to calm down and transferring his emotional state to the kids.
The actions should always be in line with your intentions. John’s intention in this instance was to calm the kids down, but instead he transferred his negative emotional state to the children.
Let’s say that you’re on a date with a girl, and you’re enjoying the connection. Everybody’s told you that “you’ve gotta kiss her on the first date man!”… so you’re gearing up for the big move. You like this girl though, you think she’s dope. Your intention is to connect with her and build something real, however your actions state different. If you act in a way that would signal a “short term hookup”, that long term connection risks loss.
It’s important to act as though you intend. If you’re looking for a quality girl, you probably shouldn’t be looking to fuck on the first date. If as a girl you’re looking for a good guy, you probably shouldn’t be dressing up and heading to the bar. Act as though you intend, because we always get what we put out as a result of our actions.
If as a guy, you’re looking for a quality girl but you’re always looking to fuck on the first date, this is going to do two things. The first is that the girls that you manage to sleep with aren’t actually quality, because a quality girl understands the importance of physical value. The second is that you’re actually going to scare the quality girls off, because the quality girls won’t be willing to give the highest form of physical value.
As a girl, if your intention is to meet a good guy, the bar probably isn’t the best place. There’s always opportunity to find diamond in the rough, but it’s better to find out what you’d look for in a quality guy and head to environments where these kind of guys would go. If your ideal man is artistic, head to festivals. If he’s athletic, head to the gym.
Act through your intentions, because your intentions aren’t always communicated properly. People don’t interpret your intentions, people interpret your actions. If you act as you intend, you remove the possibility of mis-communication on your end.
Hope this helps! Comment and SUBSCRIIIIBE <3
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It happened to me today:
I was awake early, my brother is ready for work as he walks in my room he asks for some change for the bus I gave him the change and he still thinks that I am still pissed off at him from not returning the money I gave him before I told him don’t worry about it and he goes on and says that he will get me that back. I told him before I am chill around those situations I understand the finances are tough at times. He didn’t understand me properly I guess and I told him I don’t want to talk about this at the early morning – with a nice and calm voice – I wasn’t cranky at all (its hard for me to get pissed at you or someone else though I got my own boundaries!)
As he looks at me he says that “Why are you changing the subject” I told him I am not – I just don’t want to talk about it – he though I was pissed, looks at me and slowly slams the door and gets out – as I think about it he probably mis-understood me!
Five minutes ago I walked in his room and said I am sorry but you mis-understood me though he goes on and tells me in quiet and calm voice ‘get outa here”. So I just got up and peace’d on him – don’t want any drama.
Now I said to myself – at least I tried to apologize and nothing resolved a ‘conflict’ or mis-understanding. =\
I don’t know what to think now.
Any solutions?!