Over the course of this past year, my growth has seen some steady inclines, as well as some massive declines. Sometimes I wonder where my life would have been, had I chosen to stay inside of my comfort zone of my house in Whitehorn. On October 13th, 2010, I chose to move in with Cam Adair of Kingpin Social. This move was way outside of my comfort zone, I was paying $300.00 a month in my Northeast Calgary home.
Cam sent me a message on Facebook two weeks after meeting me, asking me to move in to a condo with him Downtown. At first I was nervous, facing your fears isn’t always the easiest decision. I decided to take myself seriously though, and after a week of contemplation I decided to leap outside of my comfort zone and say yes to Cam. This would mean leaving my current roommates, opting out of my lease and moving into a condo downtown that I had no way of affording.
Talk about uncomfortable.
I used to like comfort zones, I think everybody does. I don’t think anybody minds feeling safe and secure, accepted. What about when the day comes that you realize that you want more for yourself? That day when you look at your life, and you realize that you’re not happy with where you’ve come. When that day comes, how comfortable will your comfort zone be?
Everything that you want in this life is outside of your comfort zone, otherwise you would already have it.
This past year has seen some major ups and downs for me. See, with a comfort zone, there is little chance for failure. You feel safe, secure, and understood in your comfort zone. It is yours, you are comfortable. However, as soon as you know that there’s potential for growth in your life, and you’re not taking the leap, your comfort zone doesn’t feel like home anymore.
We all need to grow, we all have room to grow, we should all be on the road to self development. Our minds are unlimited, science cannot map out will – power, potential, drive. We can take any skill set and develop it to an unlimited level, if we dedicate ourselves to the process of improvement and refuse to allow failure to be an option.
Pleasure, though, isn’t easy. In fact, it’s painful. It’s because pain and pleasure, like love and hate, are the same thing. They are just polarities of the same emotion.
What? Pain = Pleasure?
Pain = Pleasure. This is why 1% of the population owns 99% of the money, hello Occupy Calgary. Not everyone can be successful, because part of becoming successful is facing an insurmountable amount of pain. The 99% of people don’t understand the pain part of the pleasure, because there are two types of pain, thus, two types of pleasure.
SHORT TERM PLEASURE = LONG TERM PAIN
This one should be easy, shouldn’t it? I think everybody smokes marijuana, to a degree. In the moment, marijuana seems like a good move. You get high, you feel good, you’re loving life. Think to 5 years down the road, though. If you continue smoking marijuana every single day, for 5 years straight, is it going to have positive long term benefits or negative long term benefits?
This is marijuana, but this applies to all drugs, alcohol, fast food, laziness. If you drink tonight, it’ll feel good, but over the course of 5 years is it going to have positive long term benefits, or negative long term benefits? What about smoking. In the moment, it’s pleasurable. You’re stressed, you puff on a cigar and that smoke that fills your lungs almost feels good as it eats away at your throat. Over the course of 5 years, is it going to have positive long term benefits, or negative long term benefits?
You can even tie this into relationships, and hook ups. In the moment, the hook up seems like a good idea. You get sex, I get sex, we both win. Over the course of the next 5 years…
You get the idea.
“Why does it matter, if I’m only going to do it this once?”
The way you do something, is the way you do everything. If you cannot make the decision to grow today, it’s likely that you’re going to wake up tomorrow and make the decision to do it “once more”. If you want to get better, you must dedicate yourself to the positive kind of pain.
SHORT TERM PAIN = LONG TERM PLEASURE
I have an adoration for fitness enthusiasts. The people who can go to the gym every single day of their lives and dedicate their time and energy to something greater than the short term pleasure. The people who dedicate themselves to short term pain and continue to reap the benefits of long term pleasure.
Think about running on the treadmill. In the moment, it sucks ass. I know, I hate running on the treadmill. Over the course of 5 years, if you run on the treadmill for 3 days a week, 20 minutes a day, is it going to have positive long term benefits, or negative long term benefits?
What about doing your homework, instead of going out to the club with your friends. In the moment it seems like an extremely shitty decision. You really want to go out. You choose to stay home though, and miss out on a fun night. Over the course of 5 years, if you skip out on two nights a week clubbing to stay in to do homework, is that in the moment decision going to have positive long term benefits, or negative long term benefits?
Alright. Let’s talk about Social Dynamics. I’ve met with a lot of clients lately, and they’ve all been telling me about how they want to change their life. In the moment, though, they want to keep their money to do other things with. They need money to go drinking on Friday nights, to spend tastelessly on clothing they don’t know how to use to their advantage.
Short Term Pleasure = Long Term Pain
Get Serious. Change Your Life.
Then there are the smart clients, that choose to invest into Social Dynamics. The two fundamentals of Social Dynamics are assertiveness and awareness. This blog is to bring awareness, our awareness comes as a result of our assertiveness. This blog makes sense to everybody, and makes people aware, but this blog cannot train your assertiveness. I can make you aware of how to train your assertiveness, and this is the key:
You can be interested in the skill set all you want, but unless you invest in the skill set you will not take it seriously. I can want to get bigger all I want, but unless I buy a gym membership I won’t take the gym seriously. I can want to eat healthy all I want, but unless I buy healthy foods I’ll be stopping by McDonalds.
The way you do something, is the way that you do everything. Make the smart decision for your life.
Short Term Pain = Long Term Pleasure