Mikey B Show: Relationship Titles

by Mikey B

the godfatherThe Godfather is one of the most treasured films that you can watch today. The idea that one man, “The Godfather” having influence over a great number of people in this world blows my mind. The title that he held dictated the relationships that he had with every single person he interacted with. The title represented the level of respect people held of his opinion.

The roll of a title is to allow for better communication within a situation. Your boss is called your boss because without the title establishes the level of respect and authority established. In order to grow ourselves at the rate in which we most desire, it is sometimes necessary to label someone as an authority. Now I’m not saying that you give your rights up in the process or give away your power, but if you are looking to improve in any area of your life, having an authority that you respect can help the amount of growth you can unlock within yourself.

There are a lot of roles in life that we have to play in order to get ahead. Sometimes you have to play the student, and sometimes you have to play the teacher. What really matters is if both people are getting what they want out of the relationship with the title that they both deserve. A great example is the boyfriend girlfriend title. From my experiences both now and in the past, most people are actually declaring their titles to early. I’m not saying this because those relationships aren’t going there, but what I am saying is that if that title is coming, why would you take away from enjoying this present moment?

Ideally, there is no reason for anyone to ever feel like someone is a better “person” then they are, only that, that person may have more time and energy invested in that certain area. When I look at my past relationships with my previous employers, I don’t think to myself that they are no longer my boss, but I view them as a teacher of something that I am not looking to pursue. What you will notice is that I still have respect for those people. When it comes to your current “boss,” instead of thinking what I don’t like about my boss, think about the things that actually matter, which could be is this the job you actually want to learn from?

If the job your working right now is the job that you want to pursue for the rest of your life, then why would you be disrespecting your boss? I think that the right move would be to build a relationship with that person and find out what are the parameters to having that occupation as “the boss.”

I think when it comes to titles or positions that are labeled in your life concentrate more on what you can actually learn from that label and what positive value it has to offer. Michael Siarkowski is a Local athlete, fellow student of Social Dynamics, and is attending University of Calgary to be come an anaesthesiologist.

Watch the Mikey B Show where Mike and myself talk about what relationship titles really mean to Mike, myself, and people today.

Welcome back! Hit us up with a comment on what titles are important to you and why they are titles that matter to you!

About Mikey B
Mikey B is soul bound to the journey of growth. His genuine intent to better the world drives every movement, choice, and solution that Mikey B comes up with. Backed by a large heart, he has no plans to ever give up on himself, his students or the new experiences in his life.

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{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }

Angelo January 10, 2012 at 1:56 am

I like the discussion of “teacher” and “student” titles. Personally I feel that teaching is a way of learning, thus reinforcing the notions of being a student. Martial arts are a great example because we often teach techniques to each other that we have developed according to our experiences on the mat. It seems to make sense that while a lower belt can get a lot of value from a higher belt teaching them but in truth the exchange equally goes both ways. The more experienced student will see their theories/techniques tested and feel more responsible and in the long run, push them to grow.

Also i fully agree that placing titles prematurely can hinder a relationship, especially if the decision made on the relationship wasn’t mutual.

Mikey B January 20, 2012 at 1:18 pm

Thanks a lot for commenting Angelo!

I think that due to your martial art background you understand the fundamentals of being a great student and being a great teacher. The one thing that I have learned is that sometimes you have to have the respect for someone so that you can learn from them.

What do you think is an applicable form of this?

I think it could be having respect for your Martial Art Instructor so that you can learn the most from that experience, even if you don’t like/agree with him. Not saying that that is your relationship with your instructor 🙂

Angelo January 23, 2012 at 4:33 pm

Mikey B!

In an overall sense, respect is the foundation in which all relationships are built upon. Within a student-teacher scenario, respect is definitely mandatory. In a martial arts environment the absence of it poses risks to both parties. I present two vantage points:

An experienced martial arts teacher who lacks respect and understanding of his student’ individual growth tends to push them to extremes in order to produce strong competitive fighters. Seeking to satisfy the ego and ignoring students who physical fall behind but possess motivation creates a weak school and in my opinion halts everyone’s growth. I’ve seen teachers who fail to take accountability for their student’s losses because they fail to accept that their method of teaching and technique were weak. Perfect example: COBRA KAI (sweep the leg!)

A student who lacks respect for a martial arts teacher is quite frequent. You often get individuals who stroll into a gym with egos and expectations without an open mind. When they get a chance to spar, these guys often end up trying to hurt their sparring partners (which people have gotten hurt) just to gain the upper advantage and impress everyone in order to appear like a prodigy. I love seeing these guys get the lesson of humility smashed into them. Those who have stuck around long enough have done so not because they were the best or had talents, but because they respected their teacher and the art form.

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