Amidst the technological advances, the scientific breakthroughs and amazing advances in human development, cultivating healthy, positive, long-lasting relationships is something that has somehow been lost in translation.
Without an understanding of what needs/values exist and are being exchanged among people, it is very difficult/impossible to know the direction that each relationships is headed, let alone the purpose of these relationships.
To change this we need to understand that what a human being needs, a human being will value. This is one of the foundational concepts you need to understand when attempting to exchange values through different relationships.
Here’s the video for Lesson 5. Check it out and let me know what you think in the comment section below.
To better understand human need we look to “Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs”
Abraham Maslow was a psychologist in the 1940s – 1950s who created this theory for understanding human need and motivation. This theory is still taught to this day! Interestingly enough, this hierarchy aligns perfectly within the spectrum of value found in math (the number line). The assumption that we make is that what a human being will ultimately need, they will also find valuable. This allows us to view Maslow’s hierarchy of needs as Maslow’s hierarchy of value.
When building the parallels to mathematics you can see that the values in Maslow’s hierarchy can be very quantified (food, resources, job), but at the same time some values can also be seen to have “infinite” potential value (creativity, self esteem, confidence). Also the relative nature of value can also be seen. Someone is only going to value creativity, self-esteem, and confidence once their basic physiological needs are met. The amount someone may value creativity vs. food will differ based on the individual and the level their needs are being met.
The types of needs that exist can be divided into two types: external and internal.
External needs are based on survival and comfort (quantifiable needs) , whereas internal needs are based off of awareness/acceptance, connection, and fulfillment (non-quantifiable needs).
More specifically the needs outlined in Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs:
- Physiological needs – basic human needs (survival)
- Safety needs – what is needed to achieve a “secure state” of living (comfort)
- Love/belonging needs – the positive progression of a relationship (relations)
- Esteem needs – one’s view of the self and their value/s (acceptance/awareness)
- Self actualization – to realize and pursue ones full potential (purpose)
Breathing, food, water, sex, sleep, homeostasis, excretion
Security of body, of employment, of resources, of morality, of the family, of health, of property
Friendship, family, sexual intimacy
Self-esteem, confidence, achievement, respect of others, respect by others
Morality, creativity, spontaneity, problem solving, lack of prejudice, acceptance of facts
The type of value (need) that you exchange with someone else will determine the type of relationship you create.
As mentioned in prior videos, the relative nature of value can be seen throughout Maslow’s hierarchy. In fact it is this relativity of value that allows these values to be seen in any hierarchal form at all.
This means that physiological needs are where all relationships start. Without these basic needs met the human body cannot function or survive to begin meeting any of the other needs.
Similarly so, safety needs need to be met before love/belonging needs, etc. The needs listed in Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs need to be met in that hierarchal order. Values in mathematics are also arranged in a hierarchal sense, some values defined as larger then others.
Another interesting thing to note about progressing throughout the types of value is that there needs to be a balance of the needs met at each level. Too much or too little of any of these needs will cause us to be miscalibrated, misaligned and out of balance, causing our ability to build these positive, healthy, purposeful relationships to be greatly limited.
In the next few videos we will be going more into depth about the types of values, the types of relationships they create, as well as understanding another persons perception of value and how to cater to that.
P.S. If you want to accelerate your success in implementing these strategies and reaching your goals, we’d love to help you. Apply today to our Mentorship Coaching program and we’ll gladly offer you a free coaching session to see if we’re a good fit.
|Lesson 6: Value vs. Relationships|
|Lesson 7: Coming soon…|
|Lesson 8: Coming soon…|